Fighting Hatred

At the Texas State Capitol

My husband Don and I spent Memorial Day morning at the SB4 Protest Rally yesterday.  Why?  It's part of the hate-filled racist bs that is becoming more and more overt ever since El Cheeto took over.

SB4 is why I've started carrying my passport with me whenever I leave the house.  Don thought that wasn't necessary until yesterday, when one of the racist SOB Republicans called ICE so the protestors could all be detained.  Nothing happened (except that State Representatives almost came to blows over it), but it could have. And the last thing I, an American citizen, want is to be deported to Mexico or South America because some racist cop decides since I'm Hispanic I must be here illegally.  (Of course, carrying the passport only helps if they bother to look at it, but still.)

But Texas SB4 isn't just a free license to racially profile and harass people.  It's also a HUGE burden on already overworked, underpaid, and short handed police officers and police departments.  Instead of doing their jobs, Republicans want them to do ICE's job.  Or perhaps they simply want them to do it in addition to their own jobs.  I'm not sure, but either way it's a BAD idea.

In the end, it makes ALL of us less safe.

Injuries, Illness, and Exercise

I just realized it's been almost two years since I posted here.  Right before my health took a real dive, actually.  I won't go into details, but I grew very ill before having two surgical procedures in the Fall of 2015.

Once I recovered, I found out I'd developed Type II Diabetes from all the inactivity.  Needless to say, sitting in front of a computer blogging was the last thing on my mind.  I signed up for the local YMCA, discovered cardio kickboxing and water aerobics,  and took off to regain my health.

All was going really well until I was hiking the next Fall and broke my ankle.  Geez.  Another six months of inactivity.

But, finally, I recovered enough from that to start exercising again.  I went to a handful of aerobics classes and did a little weightlifting, then I promptly wrenched my knee getting out of a weightlifting machine.  Cue another six weeks of no exercise.

Once again, however, I've recovered enough to exercise.  I found out the pool, much as I love water aerobics, was disastrous for my skin.  And the cardio kickboxing classes had, for the most part, disappeared.  So I'm trying new things.  New to me, anyway.  I'm doing Zumba and Les Mill's BodyCombat.  I'm getting back to lifting.  I even tried Les Mill's BodyPump this morning.

I'm being careful with my knee, and my still-healing ankle, but I'm determined not to give up.  I WILL regain my health.  I WILL defeat the diabetes.  I WILL get back in shape.

Wish me luck.

And again

Not failed until I give up. I will not fail.

The Day After

Recovering well.  Tired, but no real pain.  Relieved it's over.

Old (Good) Habits

I spent a large part of today doing something I used to do all the time, but haven't done in a long, long time--reading other people's blogs.  Sure, I've read the occasional blog here and there, but once upon a time I made it a habit to keep up with a number of them.

Why was it a good habit?  Partially because I avoid any kind of official news source like the proverbial plague.  I tend to learn about things going on in the world through social media, including blogs.  Also because many, many times reading others' blogs would be inspiration for my own.  (I was writing more about the Craft then.  I'm willing to let myself go on this a while longer, as I try to establish a habit of writing again, about anything, but I do want to get back to that eventually.)  Lastly, it helped me connect to people in a non-threatening way that my very introverted self really needs.

I had a ton of things to do, so I felt guilty about doing it, but at the same time it felt good.  I'll definitely need to make more time for it in the future.

What habits have you let go that you wish you hadn't?

Weekend's Start

The weekend is beginning. I feel happy. A nice change.

Trying Not To Fall Into a Black Hole

I'm not feeling this at all today. Yesterday was a spectacularly bad day, and I'm still feeling it. I consider it a major accomplishment to write this much today.

I've been having some health problems for a couple of months now, and they've been getting me very down.  I've been fighting to not fall into depression because of them. It's not just the problems directly, it's that I finally felt I was on the right track to losing all the weight I need to lose, and that's been totally derailed by the fact that I can't exert any effort without being physically ill.  I can't even mentally concentrate for very long without feeling nauseous.  It's not good for my mini-habits, either.

But after multiple appointments with multiple doctors, they finally think they've figured it out.  I'm having minor surgery next Tuesday which I very much hope will take care of it. That hope is the only thing keeping me from serious depression.

I've been crying frequently and easily, seeing the positive less and the negative more, not enjoying things like I had been, and so on.  It's just too easy to despair.

My DH has been completely wonderful and fully supportive.  I really don't know what I would have done without him.  I love you, Sweetie!

I realize this post is disjointed, but I just don't have the heart to try and clean it up.

New Background Pic

NOW I remember why my blog has sat in the "construction" phase for over two years!  I set the generic background when we moved out of our house in Ontario, meaning to replace it with a picture of whatever house we got in Texas.  I took this picture when we first moved into this house, back in May of 2013. 

Then I started fooling with Blogger and templates.  I vaguely remembered it was a pain from back when I first set it up with a picture of the Ontario house.  Obviously I had blocked out most of the trauma.

I fooled with it for I don't know how long back in 2013 before giving up in frustration and disgust.  But I decided the blog had been in it's "temporary" state for way too long, and since I was actually writing in it again I should have a picture of where my life takes place now.

Aaarrrgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Let's start with a myriad of computer problems, which those of you who know me know I've been having since I've become Wiccan.  So, I started the process already annoyed and frustrated.  And it only went downhill from there.  Sigh.

But, as you can see, I at least got so far as to get an image up there this time.  It's not exactly how I wanted it, but it's up there.  I feel some sense of accomplishment at that.

I know I should probably move away from Blogger, but I'm way to lazy to really look into it much.  Although I was really tempted this morning!

Grrrrr.

A Week of Mini-Habits

It's been just over a week since I started my Mini-Habits, and I'm happy to report that they're going pretty well.  Some are going better than others, but I suppose that's to be expected.

I had originally only planned to do the blogging, creativity, and nature journal Monday to Thursday, and the cooking only when I was home.  I'm finding I may need to modify that plan.

My nature journal habit is definitely going the best of all of them.  I love doing it, and I'm already to the point where I WANT to do it seven days a week instead of the original four.  Here's a couple of pages of what I'm doing:
 

The blogging you can see here online.  I think I need to be doing this every day, even if it's just the minimum.  This mini-habit is definitely helping me get back to it, but it's happening more slowly than I'd like.

My creativity habit is going fairly well.  So far, it's been aimed mostly at my nature journal.  I added decorative papers I love to it.  It's probably helped a lot with the journaling, lol!

Front Cover

Back Cover

Inside Front Cover

Inside Back Cover

I'm also working on a pencil pouch I can attach to it so I can add color to my sketches in the field, and possibly an envelope for embellishments.

As for cooking, that's not going nearly as well as I'd hoped.  I'm definitely going to have to change that plan to every day.  I need to add a minimum activity for days I'm not at home.  Maybe reading the recipe, or even deciding what I'm going to make the day I am home.

I can't wait to see where I am in a month!

Minimum again thanks to bad time management on my part.

Appliance Woes

For perhaps the first time ever, I'm very glad about the horrendous heat here in Texas. You might wonder if I've lost my mind. I have not. What I have lost, is a water heater.

Last week we noticed we had no hot water in the master bathroom. I should probably call it the owner's bathroom, or the main bedroom bathroom, or some such, but moving on...the next morning, when it was cool enough not to actually boil your blood in the attic, DH went up and took a look. Turns out the pilot light was out.  Luckily, it has an automatic cut-off for that very purpose, so we didn't blow up or anything. Bad part about it, he couldn't get it lit again, no matter what he tried.

He came back downstairs and we resigned ourselves to cold showers, as it was a workday with no time to do anything about it that morning. And of course, being the geeks we both are, we immediately hit the 'net and started researching what could be wrong with it. Turns out it's a fairly simple do-it-yourself figure-out-what's-wrong and most likely a simple fix. And I'm very lucky that DH is very good with stuff like that (as well as lots of other things.) Me, not so much.

So it was simple, but it wasn't a workday evening type of job. We have two water heaters, one for the owner's suite and one for the rest of the house, so we could still wash dishes, clothes, etc. And we could, if we wanted to, go upstairs and use one of the guest bathrooms.  But it turns out we didn't need to do that. It's so hot here that we don't really need the hot water at the moment. Even the water in the 5000 gallon holding tank out back is pretty warm, sitting outside in the sun all day. So all we have to do is wait for the cooler water sitting in the inside pipes (shaded and somewhat air conditioned) to flow past, and we can take at least a tepid shower. Yay.

And that turns out to be really good, because in doing further research, both online and in talking to professionals, we found out that we probably shouldn't fix it. Water heaters are guaranteed for 6-9 years. This one is about 18 years old.  Why is that a bad thing? Why shouldn't I be happy it's lasted this long?  Because everyone we talked to and every site we read said that when water heaters go, it's usually spectacular. At the very least, they tend to leak and cause major water damage. At worst, they explode!

So now we're looking into replacing not only it, but maybe the other one, too. The other one's iffy, 'cause it's in the garage, so if it leaks it probably won't cause much, if any, water damage.  But the possible exploding part, that's a concern. At any rate, we're going water-heater shopping this weekend.

Meanwhile, as I write this, I'm waiting for the washing machine repair guy. It's on a totally non-related issue, and thank the Goddess it's under warranty, being as it's less than two years old. 

Still, feeling a bit appliance picked-on this week.

Doing my minimum 10 words or so today.  There, done!

Great Weekend

This past weekend was a fabulous one for DH and me.  We had a blast for three days straight, and it wasn't a long weekend or a holiday or anything.

 We start our weekends on Friday whenever we can.  I drive into work with DH and work out at the company gym until lunch, when we go out and eat together.  In the afternoon I run errands or sit and read until he can escape, which he often manages to do a little early.  Most Friday evenings are all about our Friday Feast (FF), in which we eat too much and occasionally drink too much.

We usually have our FF at home, either cooking something special or getting take out, but this Friday started with the first of what we hope will be regular date nights.  We actually went out for Mexican food and Mexican martinis.  We sat in a restaurant and everything!  This was followed by beer and live music at a local pub.  Dinner was great, but we got to the outdoor pub a little too early.  The sun was still out, and as the live music was out on the patio we nearly roasted alive.  But we're determined to make it work.  Next time, wait 'til the sun goes down!

Saturday morning was filled with massive sales.  We, or at least I, started at the Sew Much More warehouse sale.  (DH napped in the car while I shopped.)  It wasn't as impressive as I'd hoped, and almost exclusively about machine sewing and machine embroidery, neither of which interests me over much.  I did snag a couple of handy accessories, though.

Next we headed over to the Citywide Garage Sale.  My main objective here was to meet my fitness goal in the air conditioning.  I also hoped to find some really cool jars to use as water glasses for my watercolor painting.  No luck there (everything was either too fancy or too expensive, or both) but I DID meet my fitness goal of thirty minutes of motion.

After lunch we headed to the grocery store.  We'd found an appealing grilled shrimp recipe we wanted to try, and while we were there we picked up some gorgeous salmon as well.

An evening spent cooking, grilling, laughing, and drinking WAY too much wine turned into a very late night of watching hilariously bad movies.  We didn't go to bed until after 2:00 am, four hours or so after our regular bedtime, because we were having so much fun neither of us wanted to quit.  (This was actually a bad thing, as both of us are night-owls who will stay up until dawn at the least provocation.  We fight that proclivity and try to go to bed closer to 10:00, but it's hard.  And we've been paying for it for the last three nights as we try and fail to get to bed before midnight.  Well worth it, though.)

Sunday started late, not too surprisingly.  We cooked up a yummy frittata for a late brunch, then spent the rest of the day being productive around the house and running a couple of local errands.  We basked in the feeling of accomplishment from everything we got done, and then the weekend ended with fabulous fish tacos made with the salmon we grilled the night before.  Culinary delight!

Something about the everyday stuff that made up this weekend was magickal, and I truly wished it would never end.

A New Beginning

I can't believe it's been nearly a year since I was here.  Just over ten months.  The thing is, I really enjoy writing this, when I do it.  And it's easy.  So I have no idea why I just don't.

No matter.  I've been reading a book by Stephen Guise titled Mini Habits:  Smaller Habits, Bigger Results.  It's all about setting what the author calls "stupid small" goals to try and form habits that will turn into something larger.  The idea is to make them so small that you won't resist them and they won't cost you much willpower.  He claims he got into shape by setting a Mini Habit of one push-up a day, and he swears by the method, so I'm willing to give it a try.

I've set four Mini Habits for myself, which is the maximum he recommends at any one time.  He actually encourages people to do two or three, but as per usual I'm impatient.  :)

The first one has to do with starting a nature journal.  I've been wanting to do it since I moved here, and I'm hoping this will start me on that path.  The Mini Habit I will try to cultivate is simply to step outside for thirty seconds each day.  I tried it earlier, and it did make me wish I'd brought the journal with me, so tomorrow that is what I'll do.

The second stupid small habit I'm trying to acquire has to do with writing this blog.  I will achieve success by writing ten words each day, Monday through Thursday.  I can always do more, as I'm dong here, but I must do the minimum.

The third is being more creative in general.  The habit here is to go upstairs where most of my arts and crafts supplies are.  That's it.  I don't have to do anything once I'm there, I can simply turn around and come back downstairs if I so choose.  But most likely I won't.

Lastly, I want to cook more, so I have set myself the minimum goal of gathering the first ingredient.  Again, that's it.  If I choose to not go any further, to put whatever it is back up, I still win.  I'm hoping once I get over the resistance to starting I'll go ahead and make whatever it was I was planning.

According to the book, studies have shown that habits take anywhere from 18 to 254 days to form, depending on the habit, the person, how much they want to form it, and so on.  Much different from the 21 or 30 days most pop-psych books claim.

I guess I'll find out if it works somewhere between three and thirty-six weeks.

Summer

Since autumn is almost upon us, I thought I’d take a look back and make a list of what summer means to me.  It was much more difficult than you might think; summer has long been my least favorite season, most especially here in Texas, where I find myself once again.  (Once upon a time I hated sunlight.  Then I moved to British Columbia, and learned to appreciate it. But now that hatred is creeping back.) But here’s what I enjoy about this season we’re about to leave.  Your mileage may vary.

• Fresh food—strawberries, watermelon, blueberries, blackberries, cantaloupes, raspberries, cherries, avocados, hot peppers, corn, green beans, tomatoes, basil, garlic
• Eating outside—grilling, picnics, outdoor patios at restaurants
• Swimming—pools, lakes, rivers, oceans
• The Beach—sand, sun, waves, water, salt spray, a good book, a shading umbrella
• Minimal clothing—shorts, tank tops, sandals, sundresses, swimsuits
• Creature comforts—air conditioning, ice cream, frozen alcoholic beverages
• Mostly clear nighttime skies—stars, planets, constellations, falling stars, meteor showers, the MOON!
• Also--warm summer evenings, fireflies, skyclad outdoor rituals, two a.m. spur-of-the-moment road trips

What are your favorite parts of summer?

Labor Day Weekend

(I'm about a week late with this, but if I don't do it now, I'll never get it done.)

This was a busy weekend for us.  First, the snake training refresher, which many of you saw on Facebook--an awful and stressful, but totally useful and needed, event. Then, a wonderful, magical rest of the weekend!  Roadtrips, great food, rediscovering us, enjoying our dogs--it was incredible.  I didn't take any pics of the towns, restaurants or other people places we visited, but here are some of the natural highlights.

A view of the Texas hill country.

An angry cow, found on one of the numerous back roads we traveled which had loose livestock roaming around them.

A place that has become one of our favorite places in all of Texas.  

The ubiquitous cactus in bloom.

Obviously near a water source, as you won't find green like this anywhere else in this state at this scorching time of year.

Naturally terraced cactus.

The aforementioned water.  Surface water is a rare sight here in this drought.

More terraces.

DH, Don, intent on something.  :)

This might be my favorite shot of over 100 pictures.  Don, again, this time watching his step.

 Limestone cliffs near the bats.

 

Aaaargh!!!!

I've had trouble with electronics ever since I started on my current Wiccan path.  Even a little before, actually. 

For instance, I used to LOVE wristwatches.  I own close to twenty of them, I love them so much.  But I no longer wear them.  They won't last more than a handful of days after I put a new battery into them before they just quit working.  They don't slow down, they don't do anything but just stop. Also, I can no longer install software.  I can't even be near when my DH installs it or it won't work for him, either.  I've had so much trouble with my iPhone (and, subsequently, with Apple customer service) that I've changed my password to a version of "I hate Apple."  My new car is having so many electrical troubles (and Chrysler's customer service has been nothing but a big joke so far) that DH and I are seriously considering pressing a Lemon lawsuit. 

There are lots and lots of instances like that, small and large, but I won't go on.  Suffice it to say that the modern world and I no longer get along too well.  I've learned to get around it, most of the time.  But today.  Oh, man, today.

A friend of mine posted on her blog for the first time in a long time, as I'm doing now.  It's on LiveJournal, and I haven't been there since she last posted.  I thought, cool!  I'll just go over there and see what she's got to say.  Wrong.  I tried to sign into LJ and it said my password was wrong.  No problem.  Maybe I just didn't remember it after so long.  I told it I forgot my password.  It got lost in the weeds.  Sigh.  I tried a number of other times, but same problem.  I finally got it to go to the reset screen, and went through the process of resetting my password.  Then it said accounts like mine didn't have passwords.  But if I tried to enter without any password it said I needed one.  Sigh again.  So I signed in through FaceBook (and don't even get me started about FB.)  It let me in, but wouldn't let me see my friend's post.  My friend checked, and yes, I did indeed have permission to see it.  Still couldn't.  Tried more password stuff. No avail.  I then spent an hour or so trying to log out.  Hah!  Still, I finally did it.  Then I went back in with my Google password.  Finally, SUCCESS!  Although, sorry, Jenn.  By that time it was just a teensy bit anti-climatic.  :)   

But, enough of my rant.  I'm very happy that she posted an entry today, and I hope it inspires me to start posting regularly again myself.  And I'd rather have magick than technology anyway.

But do any of my witchy friends have problems like this?

Trying to Get Back

I've just realized that I haven't posted anything here in months.  The next post after the last one was supposed to be about the interior of the house, but I didn't get to take pictures before the boxes filled every room, so it never happened.  Unfortunately, when I plan a post and don't get to it, I get this block about posting anything else, as well.  It has always taken major willpower for me to 'skip' the planned post and write about something else.

Of course, I'd been backing off on blogging for a while before this.  I've tried and tried and haven't been able to figure out why.  It's not that I don't want to do it, and it's certainly not that I don't have anything to write.  I just can't seem to find the words.

I suppose it could have something to do with the sleep apnea.  As many of you know, I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea a month or so ago.  Before that I'd been sleeping 14-16 hours a day and been exhausted the rest of the time anyway.  I'm doing much better now, though.  I've gotten my c-pap machine, and I'm now sleeping a much more normal 8 hours or so, and have tons of energy besides. 

We'll see if it extends to writing this blog.

House

The sellers' bank finally got all their ducks in a row, and it looks like we'll be taking possession of the house on May 15th.  (Yay!) We've lots to do before then--well and septic and house inspection, lining up painters and choosing colors, figuring out what goes where before the moving truck shows up, and so on.

In the meantime, here are the promised pictures:

The first view of the house as you drive up the driveway.

A closer look at the front door.

The view from the front door back down the driveway to the road.

And, last but not least, the current fenced backyard.  It will be the puppies' haven until we learn about acre fencing.

That's it for now.  I don't feel comfortable posting pics of the inside until we actually take possession.  Not to mention until it gets painted--right now it's a truly disturbing gray color.

One of the many things that we love about it is that it sits on just under three acres at the end of a cul-de-sac.  (Plenty of privacy for outdoor rituals!)  We also love the main floor owners' suite with french doors out to the back yard.  (Great for letting the dogs out early in the morning.)  The stonework fireplaces in both the family room and the owners' suite are fabulous, despite the fact they won't get much use here in Central Texas.  And the kitchen has recently been upgraded, so we won't have to do it ourselves.  (This would be the FOURTH house in which we'd have had to do that.)

That's not to say that we don't already have plenty of plans for improvements!  Besides fencing the entire property and paining the interior, we want to add a larger deck, pool, and outdoor kitchen, since so much of life down here takes place outdoors!

I can't wait to get started!

Whole Lotta Stuff

I just realized I haven't posted anything here since I had the flu back in January (VERY sick for almost two weeks), followed almost immediately by the packing up of our household.   Since then DH and I have said goodbye to lots and lots of people we love in Ontario, taken the dogs, and moved back to Austin, Texas.  We had to give up the cats, a topic which is almost too painful to even mention.  We're in temporary housing now, waiting to hear on an offer we've made on a house, and are busy reconnecting with people and a city that was very hard to leave in the first place, some fourteen years ago.

I was worried about the puppies and the heat, given their thick winter undercoats, but we've been extremely lucky to actually have Spring here this year.  Temperatures are hovering around 60F (16C), occasionally dipping down to freezing or soaring close to 90F (32C).  The guys have started blowing their winter coats, which is messy, but otherwise seem to be doing okay.  They (and we) participated in the Mighty Texas Dog Walk this past weekend, a charity event to benefit service dogs.  Next weekend, they're going to Snake Aversion Training, to keep them safe from rattlesnakes and copperheads.  Later they will participate in more training involving coral snakes and maybe cottonmouths.

The drive down was mostly a lot of fun, though finding truly pet-friendly hotels on-the-fly was sometimes challenging.  We took time out to visit the Wild Turkey distillery in Kentucky and walk barefoot (in February!) in Northern Texas.  Kai took an extreme dislike to a statue of Abe Lincoln in Cincinnati, and had to bark at it, a lot, every time he stepped outside of the hotel where we were staying.

DH and I, as I mentioned, are reconnecting with family and friends, exploring old haunts and new attractions, and enjoying the food WAY too much.  It's a bit disconcerting that Austin has literally doubled in size since we left, but we're adjusting to it.  We've spent the last month or so searching for a house.  We found one we absolutely loved, but apparently the owner didn't really want to sell, so our offer went ignored.  We've found another house we like almost as much, and should know by tomorrow whether our offer was accepted or not.

That's the last ten weeks or so in a nutshell.  I'll post pictures of the house if we get it, otherwise it's back to the drawing board.

Wish us luck!